If you shove its head through its butthole, then it's a cockring

Sessions 59, 60, and 61

We make our way back to main hall, facing the large chamber doors. Unable to perceive anything from the other side, Maltheo opens the door with Briya and Prophet behind him. Kra'naelen moves to the side for cover. They see that it opens into a large room that is longer than it is wide. It ends in a curved dome wall. The ceiling is higher than everywhere else we've seen so far: nearly 50 feet high, and supported by two rows of four columns. The floor is stone and each side has a lava flow dugout carved to match the design of the room. They're "collector" flows from the flows we saw before.

About halfway down, there's a door leading to somewhere on the left. There seems to be at the end of the hall, in the half-dome, a red glowing statue/figure; something like molten metal. Maltheo creeps into the chamber stealthily to try and perceive if anyone else is in the vicinity. Truly, the room feels empty.

He makes his way closer to the statue; it's an older and large androgynous humanoid shape. The rest of the group follows. Where the head would be are spikes that are curved & swirling. Prophet realizes this status doesn't represent any sort of known god. It doesn't seem linked to anything any of us have known so far. It feels much older; certainly pre-Calamity. It could possibly have been left in effigy of the primordial elementals. Even though it's made from stone, it's glowing white-hot, as though it were metallic.

For the sake of exploring quickly, we open the door on the left side of the room to find one similar to the others from before. This one is circular, but has no lava flow. There seems to have been furniture at one time, but it's all been tossed aside into a giant pile. There are two sets of doors, one to the east (double) and one to the north (single).

Checking the door to the north, Maltheo notices a giant yellow eye carved about six feet high into the door. We saw something similar in the platinum mine where we fought the mind-controlled miners and the mind-flayer. We're almost certainly being watched.

Prophet notices movement near the glowing statue in the other room from the doorway. A woman wearing a blood-covered form-fitting dress.

"Such a magnificent steed. Such power in you. Time for your companions to see this power. Guide them. Guide them..."

He tells us what she said, in an embellished way, and that he should show us or guide us with his powers.

As we approach the double-doors, the singular door's eye blinks. Intelligence saving throws! "Finally you're here, you're all here." Kra'naelen, Maltheo, Cass, and the Pegasus all take 29 damage and are stunned. After multiple re-rolls, we manage to break free. Maltheo stabs the eye in the door with a Nat 20 flourish. It pops open and drips yellow ooze. It's an Eye of Farsight! That means it's from an intelligent humanoid that must have implanted it on the surface, and can use it  to spy through the eye.

During that time, Cass felt in the space behind Maltheo, a shadowy figure with a feminine voice:

"How special you've become. Pulling on threads of fate like yarn from a ball. I understand your wont for vengeance, for the same fire burns in my heart. I can give you everything you need."

In a meditation pose, Prophet casts Commune as the group starts short resting. He reaches the private mental space he needs; an entire galaxy blue-purplish starry background surrounds him. Standing on solid ground in a few inches of crystal clear water with slow, silvery currents in it. At different spots in the water, there are faintly glowing lily pads, twelve of them, all different sizes connected to each other with roots and vines in the water. He feels a presence and knows someone is listening.

He's shocked that this is working. It's the first time it has happened and after so much blunderbuss preaching to everyone before. His mind is tormented by the bloody woman's curse. He doesn't know what his path is. And so he asks:

(1) Are any of these visions we're having real?
A ripple moves across the water. The answer is sort of yes and no. The red woman was real for Prophet, but the visions of the others haven't been.

(2) Are we safe in this room?
Another ripple that gives the answer of most likely yes.

(3) Am I a good person?
More ripples; this time it feels chaotic — discordant ripples among the sounds of creation. Prophet feels the answer, a strong "perhaps", coming to him from the song itself. A suggestion to make a movement forward. The lily pads start glowing different colors. 3 are blue; 1 is pink; 2 orange; 1 red; 1 yellow; 4 green. They come together in a pure white light showing a path forward in goodness.

He comes out of his commune sobbing with tears. Virtue, the Pegasus, nudges his face. The group finishes a short rest and heals up as best they can.

A few things happen during the short rest.

Kra'naelen notices a very familiar smell of woods at night. He remembers walking through the woods at night, with a warm welcoming at the end of a path. A low voice says:

"Look how the handsome boy has grown; grown so much. I knew you were special the moment we met. I cared for you once. Will you care for me now?"

He replies, "I'm not sure how I can help you where I am now at this juncture..." and then hears, "The question isn't how, but will you?" It then dissipates and he's back to himself.

Prophet receives a sending spell from Tisiphone. "Prophet, you are officially wanted by the state of Xhorhas. It would behoove you to return immediately before our arcanists and diviners find you." He replies, "Good to hear from you! There must be some misunderstanding. We will speak as soon as I'm done helping these lost souls."

Briya also hears a lower, growly voice:

"Sweet little girl. There is nothing for you here. Turn back while your life is still yours."

Briya asks Maltheo who he saw earlier and learns that it was probably his mother. Prophet says that all of us are hearing voices and seeing things and none of them are real. Briya describes the voice she heard as some kind of gravelly demonic rumble.

This causes the group to have a bigger conversation about what we all saw. Kra'naelen explains a bit more about his "in between" existence experience in the woods with the warm welcome at the end.

The group goes for the non-eye double doors as we feel we were being prevented from opening them. They open to a huge whoosh of very hot air. Warmer than before. There's a set of stairs leading down and sound coming from the bottom. A sort of clanging. Briya opens the eye door to check before we leave the room to see what's there. A storage area not much bigger than a bathroom. Leaning against a wall are 15 spears made of solid platinum that we put into the bag of holding.

As we stealth down the stairs, we all hear excited voices: "Hello hello, welcome welcome..." and the following scene is set before us:

At the bottom of the stairs we open into an 80 foot high chamber mostly filled with lava. We land on a platform overlooking a river of lava going under us. In front we find the remnants of an old temple. It's been reshaped to modern needs but was obviously used beforehand for ancient purposes. The entire platform and other items all seem to be made entirely from platinum. Maltheo activates his black flame wings and takes on the somewhat Aarakocra appearance of the drug dealer he killed. The blade is golden in hue. Black flames surrounding eagle eyes. Prophet casts telepathic bond. We note that the four flayers are wearing fire ashari outfits... and then realize they actually are the missing fire ashari. Four voices all at once: "Welcome welcome. The ones who murdered T'suk. We've been waiting."

Initiative!

Combat with 4 mind flayers and other enthralled fire Ashari.

While combat continues, Prophet tries to free a captive tiefling, but notices it has tubes draining its life force that lead down into the floor. The Fox is looking bad; there's some sort of faerie fire that is hurting it. Maltheo is able to stun the red-caped flayer, and it falls and dies. The enthralled fire Ashari woman begins reciting an old Ashari prayer that sounds overlayed with flayer voices. We discern that it's to trigger ancient Ashari defences within the temple when we notice patterns starting to glow on the walls. Everything starts to light up.

A rumble comes from the entrance stairs.

Maltheo attempts to make a deal with the Fox and unlocks the cage after it gives a yes. The faerie fire fades, as does the spacial anomaly and tether that it was attached to. As the lock opens, we all feel in our minds something coming from deep below where we are; severe anger and frustration. Something is happening and it has made someone very angry.

A lair action triggers lava floes coming down the stairs and they now make them completely inaccessible. Two of the snakes turn into fire elemental salamanders, and lava floods the entry area leaving only two small perches remain.

There's an emotional cut scene. Maltheo has been tentacle-grappled by a mind flayer and almost has his brains sucked out to 1 HP. He hears a voice from deep below that says, "It seems like someone is in trouble... need anything?" Maltheo replies, "I can't die right here!" and the voice replies, "I understand. Dying is unfortunate. I think you could do a lot for yourself and for me if you still live. Do you agree?" Maltheo hesitates, but shouts,  "No! I own my soul. No one else." And received a final reply of, "Suit yourself."

Yahnist finally gets a hit and discovers the flayers are not resistant or immune to any damage or conditions. Prophet has a quite heroic feat of yanking goo-covered tentacles out of Maltheo, of which Cass takes a mental picture to use for later dream torture ideas.

But it isn't enough to save Maltheo from death. An adjascent thrall beats him while he's down, and Malthod dies. His spirit hears sounds of woods at night; dead trees all around and leaves on the ground. Far in the distance is a vision of an inn with a nice warm and welcoming fireplace. As he sees it, he knows he could go, but then hears a "Oh, no. No. That's not for you," and be moves on to whatever afterlife he believes in. This is all happening while Prophet is singing Stayin' Alive while performing a CPR Healing Word on Maltheo's corpse.

Cass dive-bombs to try and save the now-tentacled Prophet, but rolls a 2 and is unsuccessful. As he's fading away, Prophet wonders where the closest Luxon beacon is. Knowing there are 3 in Rosohna, but he doesn't know if any are nearby.

A combination of Bend Luck and Silvery Barbs saves him from the Flayer's final attack to deflect it. He hears a commanding and feminine voice say, "Looks like you've caught someone's attention already. You're an interesting one. Wouldn't it be a shame if the Prophet's story ended here? I think you need help. You do need a little help."

"For you to offer help, you must be good. So I accept!" he says. "So long as you help me with the other one... you might be in conflict with her."

"Oh it won't be a problem. You have a deal, Prophet. Be careful though, it seems your dance card is almost full. A deal has been struck."

Kra'naelen tries to move to cast his Illusory Attacker to free Prophet, but is opportunity attack face tentacled, and we watch the magic fade from his eyes and foci in his death as his brain is removed.

A last-ditch effort by Cass to "season" Prophet's brain with a poison she previously collected. It works, because as the flayer extracts Prophet's brain, the poison takes hold and it becomes blinded. But it's not enough, as Prophet also dies. His last thought is, "At least Maltheo has a chance. And WTF with the deal I just made?!"

Yahnist, Briya, and Virtue see the Prophet die but also begin combusting into bright purple and silver flames. There's an explosion of fire bursting out in all directions. Anyone within 15 feet takes 21 fire damage, and the flayer dies. Stone's Endurance helps Yahnist take only 9 of the damage. The thrall that had killed Maltheo takes damage but lives. Prophet is suddenly standing alive and well as before, with 21 HP. However, one of his eyes is completely red as before, but now the other is black with a burning purple flame. Prophet also now has two small horns sticking out of his forehead.

Virtue kills the thrall, and flies Yahnist into the sky. Briya swoops down and drops form to Revivify Maltheo back to life with one HP. He's conscious and surprised to see Prophet in such a state.

A wave of intense anger hits us all from deep below the mountain. For a moment, this psychic scream gives a mental image of a great enormous dark purple body of a broken phoenix on the ground. One of its wings is missing. On top of it, is a strange platinum contraption where something tried to build a replacement wing. On the nape of the neck is the answer to many questions: a giant elder brain sucking on the body and life force of the Phoenix. Back in the cavern with the group, the final living flayer has broken away from the elder brain hive, and taps a metal fork to plane shift away.

As this happens, the last few thralls still alive (the druid woman and 3 commoners) all die; the severed hive extinguished them.

End of the battle

Cass gives Maltheo a healing kit slap. Briya runs over to the corpse of Kra'naelen; Maltheo gives Prophet a look of disgust as he also goes to Briya and Kra'naelen. "Can you help him?" Maltheo wraps up Kra'naelen in some spare clothing and says, "I'm sorry." Briya helps and they put him into the bag of holding.

Maltheo helps the two infernals out of their cages, and goes to the Fox and kneels in front of him and says, "We've paid a great price to free you. And you owe me a favor. You will come with us to Molaesmyr and undo the shit you did there. You understand me?" The Fox agrees with no resistance.

Briya goes to the Fox to have a conversation. "Why? Why did you do what you did to me and my clan?" and is told, "I just thought it would be fun, honestly. I can't resist being mischievous, and nature should be for all, not locked away with a protection charm. It was fun to burn it."

None of the dead seem to have any valuable loot, save for the magical staff that one of the flayers was carrying. It's metallic with head of an octopus burning blue. Yahnist decides to keep it before he knows what it does. Briya checks the druid woman to look for fire Ashari stuff. She carries a necklace with their insignia on it, as does the captain. Briya takes them both.

Prophet wonders how we can save the Phoenix. It's interesting in that they cannot die. But perhaps it's why the brain fused to the Phoenix in the first place. An Arcana check puts two and two together to realize that perhaps the elder brain was doing all this to gain fire resistance or immunity. Now that we have thwarted the ritual, it will most likely mean the elder brain will die. But it also means the Phoenix has a chance to resurrect now.

Maltheo thanks Prophet for saving him, but says he's also very conflicted. "As a friend, let me ask you what the fuck were you thinking?! What did you do to yourself? To your soul? Not once, but twice now? A deal with a devil?! Some of us didn't ask to be burned like this, and yet you chose it. Next time, when you plan on unleashing evil on the world perhaps think before you act."

"I asked them to fight each other don't worry — they'll cancel each other out." Maltheo holds a mirror to Prophet's face, "This is what you look like now." Prophet tries to hide his horns with his hair.

The group looks around for a way to find an exit, but there seems to be none except for the overflowing lava tube down the stairs. Briya wonders if we can turn off the protection sigils, and realizes that like most enchantments, they can be dispelled. She tries using an upcast Dispel Magic. It works! The lava lowers and reveals the stairs leading back up to the main room.

Taking the exit back to the small room where we short-rested previously, the group tries a long rest. It's been a very bittersweet victory, but we do have the Fox and 2 tieflings with us. The long rest starts.

The group calculates the value of the 15 platinum weapons they took to be 22,500 gold and Prophet identifies the magical staff:

Mindscorcher
Staff, very rare (requires attunement by a spellcaster)

The Mindscorcher is an intricately designed platinum staff. Its surface adorned with alien runes that seem to writhe and pulse with an otherworldly energy. Fae Fyre glows continuously from its head.

You have resistance to Psychic damage while you hold this staff, and can cast the Faerie Fire spell (as a 1st level spell) at-will.

This magical quarterstaff has 9 charges. While holding it, you can use an action to expend 1 or more of its charges to cast the Scorching Ray spell from it, using your spell attack bonus. The spell’s level increases for each charge spent above the first.

Whenever you hit a creature with a melee weapon attack, or a Scorching Ray attack, from this staff, you can expend an extra charge from this staff to cast Dispel Magic on the target using your spell save DC.

You can also expend 5 of the staff’s charges to cast Dispel Magic or Remove Curse on anyone currently affected by this staff’s Faerie Fire spell.

The staff regains 1d6 + 4 expended charges daily at dawn. If you expend the last charge, roll a d20. On a 1, the staff melts in your hands and is destroyed.

And finally, the group levels up to 11!